Why is youth deciding not to drink?

Utolsó frissítés hétfő, 29/04/2024

From Tom Holland to Miley Cyrus, young Europeans make waves in the sober scene, embracing a range of motivations from health and religion to battling addiction and breaking taboos around non-drinking.

Tom Holland, Miley Cyrus, Cara Delevingne, Demi Lovato….. From celebrities to our own friends, many youngsters are openly quitting alcohol. Reasons to be or to become sober are numerous: for some, it can be for a health condition, for others, it can be religious. There are also those who just don’t like the taste of it, those who are struggling with addiction or trauma, and those who want to create sober events to break the taboo of sobriety. Here are some portraits of young Europeans, to explore the reasons why they currently don’t or have never drunk alcohol.

Victoria, 25, Brussels, Belgium: “It filled a void in me, but it was never enough. I was losing myself”

Victoria discovered alcohol during scouts’ parties at 13 years old. In the beginning, it was only something fun they did during parties, “but bit by bit, it became kind of a habit, a huge part of my life.” They also discovered drugs a few years later and “it became like a passion. But little by little, it ate me. At that time, I was just losing myself: I was losing my happiness, my life... I became depressive, anxious and suicidal. I had to confront myself that I had a problem: I was unable to use drugs and alcohol in the way other people did. Because I found something in it that filled a void in me, but it was never filling it enough, you know.”

That’s when they decided to quit. They went to sharing groups and managed to stay sober. Today, it has been 15 months since they drank alcohol or did drugs. “It’s a day-by-day process so I can just speak from where I am today. I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. I can relapse. And I am working to stay sober, because I have realised that I am really happier like that. It’s not that life became easier, it’s just that I am a safer person for me and for my friends” they confess.

That’s when they created ‘Focking Sober’ with their friend Ethellel. They were happily surprised about the reception their proposal got: “We did a general call for projects expressing something about sobriety, and we received like 50 different artists of music, cinema, techno, drawing, painting, tattoo, theatre… So much stuff! And we decided to organise a festival of one edition. But while doing that, other artists came and it became bigger and bigger, and we realised that there was also a need”, they explain.

They describe how, as party lovers, Ethelle and they missed this atmosphere: “Sobriety really changed our way to party, and we were missing the possibility of parties existing with sobriety. We wanted to be able to create that space and make it as dirty as a normal party (laughs). It’s not an event for sober people, it’s just a sober event. You can just come because you want to try something new!” And they obviously weren’t the only ones missing such events: “we had so much feedback that such spaces were needed. A lot of people were asking how the hell did that not happen before?!”

Ethelle, 22, Brussels, Belgium: “We want to change the way we celebrate”

With Victoria, Ethelle created the collective “Focking Sober”. For their first event, music, exhibitions, performances, tattoos, food and alcohol-free drinks were all present. “We want to change the way we celebrate. We don’t want to just go into a room where there is only music and you take drugs and drink, and you can’t talk with your friends because the music is so loud and that’s it… Focking Sober is another proposition” explains Ethelle.

Her willingness to launch such an event is directly linked to her own experience. Four years ago, she understood she had to stop drinking: “I am an addict” she sums up. “Quitting is a journey. It’s a long way. It’s also difficult because people usually don’t know a lot about it, so you have no tools. But I am accepting my condition more and more, and Focking Sober is a way to make something for sober people.”

After the announcement of the event, the collective got many reactions: “We receive a lot of love, so much love! And also bad comments. But it’s interesting too, because we learn a lot about the vision of sobriety in the party [environment].” She is also glad to see that such events bring people to question their own relationship to alcohol: “By seeing us happy and dancing, people see that it’s possible to be sober, even for one night. That it’s possible to make things differently.”

Joe, 24, Skopje, North Macedonia: “I have never drunk [alcohol] and I don’t plan to”

Joe (name has been changed), born and raised in Skopje, North Macedonia, has “never even tried alcohol” and he has no plans to change this decision. “The main reason for that is religion. A lot of people here are Muslims and it's not that I follow everything exactly how it should be, but I do try to”, he explains. “One of the things that is prohibited is alcohol because you lose your social inhibition”. The biggest concern that comes with losing it is not having control over yourself because “when you're not in control, a lot of things can happen”.

“Sometimes, if a lot of my friends are getting drunk, there's a part of me that wants to join them in that fun”, Joe admits. “Sometimes you gotta be okay with missing out”. Even though his closest family also doesn’t drink, his parents never forbade it. “The fact that they made that choice made it even easier for me [to not drink]”.

A common effect of alcohol is a boost of confidence. “That's actually another reason why I don't want to drink, I want to build that confidence naturally and not rely on anything else”, explains Joe. Not drinking because of the consequences alcohol can have on your physical performance when you do sports, is also another reason for Joe to not want to go near it.

Ana, 28, Aveiro, Portugal: “I only drank for social reasons and never liked the taste”

As someone who never drank a lot, Ana had an easy decision on stopping to drink due to digestive problems. “I only drank for social reasons and never liked the taste”, she adds. Taking “a sip in a beer” or “do a shot once or twice a year” may happen but nothing more than that. Even if alcohol can be the cheapest option while at a bar, lemonade or water are beverages she prefers. Like Joe, Ana also doesn’t like the feeling of losing control. “As soon as I realised I was seeing things slower or was getting kind of dizzy, I would stop drinking. I never blacked out, never cried, never became violent”, she explains.

Not drinking did have some impact while meeting new people though. “For example, a year ago I was on Tinder and I started talking with this guy. I told him I didn’t drink and he just stopped talking to me. Then a very strange thing happened when I posted a photo with my sister and there were one or two beers around. He thought the beer was mine and started talking to me again because of that, like «I am only interested if you drink alcohol»”, she shares. Ana never thought this was something she had to change to please others though - “if you don’t like it, it’s your problem. For me, this is settled”.

Education and culture also play a big role in the relationship we can have with alcohol. “This should be talked about during our education, but it isn’t. In Portugal, there is a culture of drinking just for the sake of it and without control. I don’t relate to this but it’s something you see when you go out and people are on the ground, blacked out. We need to educate people on the topic but, politically, there also haven’t been initiatives for this to change”, she concludes.

Antoinette, 29, Paris, France: “Alcoholism is also in your DNA, and I don’t want to have this problem too”

Antoinette also has this fear of losing control: “I always stop drinking when I feel I’m cheerful; the step before being drunk.” For her, this behaviour is closely related to her mother’s relationship with alcohol: “She is an alcoholic and I spent almost my entire youth taking care of her, seeing her being drunk… So I really have this rejection, or disgust, about seeing people too drunk. It reminds me of many bad memories.”

Her mother’s addiction has a big impact on her own relationship with alcohol. “Sometimes, when I drink I have this little voice in my head that says “Come on, let’s take another drink”. But I know I can’t listen to that voice. Because alcoholism is a disease, but it is also in your DNA. So, I know I might have this problem too, and I don’t want this to be a reality. So, I prefer not to drink too much.” She also feels like she could not be romantically involved with someone having addiction issues: “I could never date a boy who has problems with drugs or with alcohol. It would remind me of too many memories.”

She was really ashamed of it for most of her life. Her mother had an important and very respected job, so Antoinette felt it was deeply taboo for her mum to talk about her alcoholism. “But it is a disease that can affect everyone, so I am more comfortable talking about it now”, she adds. She is also more confident about her choice: “In some countries, especially in France, it is normal to drink every day. Plus, when you’re young, it’s cool to drink. Now I really don’t care about the social pressure. If someone tells me « Oh you don’t drink alcohol! » I answer: « No, I don’t want to! ». I never miss alcohol, I never felt the need to be wasted. If the people I am with are boring, they won’t be funnier if I’m drunk. I just wait for the moment to pass (laughs)”.

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Meet the authors

Iris Tréhin

Currently working as a freelance journalist for TV in France. I am very versatile: I can write, film, take pictures, edit (both video and sound) and voice-over. Social and cultural subjects are my favourites: feminism, societal issues, documentaries, TV series... I am an adventurous person. I travel as much as possible, always trying to think out of the box and step outside my comfort zone. In two years, I have planned to drive around the world and produce video portraits of inspiring people.

Rute Carlos Matos Cardoso

I’m a Portuguese young journalist and curious is my middle name. I’ve worked with all media formats (TV, radio, printed and online), covered almost every topic possible and moved to three different countries, so far. After writing for a youth magazine and founding a podcast, in North Macedonia, I took charge of a youth TV, in Denmark. Right now, I’m starting a freelancing career and I’m excited to continue to give voice to young Europeans through the European Youth Portal.

This article reflects the views of the authors only. The European Commission cannot be held responsible for it.